While waiting for a book required by my adoption agency to come back to the library, I checked out a different book on the same subject by the same author: Raising Adopted Children by Lois Ruskai Melina. I enjoyed this book, and I believe that this is a good introduction to adoption but not exhaustive (unlike the last book I reviewed). It seemed light on certain subjects, but it was an eye opener in other areas. For example, Dr. Melina brought to light working with health care professionals that understand adoption and know how to be sensitive about it.
This book was written from the viewpoint of a woman unable to have her own biological children, and so I felt that I could relate to her. She discusses the grieving process that occurs. She seems to write a bit from this point of view, so some people going through the adoption process for other reasons might have a hard time digesting that information.
Dr. Melina gave advice from her own experiences having adopted two international children from abroad, and I would definitely recommend it to anyone else planning to adopt internationally. She has insights that I would never have thought on my own. Yet, she still offers plenty of advice to parents of all types of adoption.
I appreciated how she illustrated a child’s understanding of adoption at various ages. She did a beautiful job sharing how we can explain adoption to our child in ways that he or she will grasp. She also indicated developmentally why children will ask certain things at some points in their life and not others.
This book was the first one I read that opened my eyes to open adoption. Although I’m not entirely swayed to do an open adoption, I think I learned how to have a more meaningful semi-open adoption for my (future) child.
I would definitely recommend this book to people in the beginning stages of adoption.