It happened again.

On Saturday we drove up to Maryland for a wedding.  We were well over an hour early so we stopped for some coffee for us and a feeding for Wren.  Because there was not a diaper changing station in the coffee shop, Wren and I went to the adjacent bookstore to use their facilities.

In the bathroom were several other women from the coffee shop who then commented on how beautiful my daughter was. As we were returning to Okey, another woman stopped to talk to Wren and me.  She said that she worked at a child development center, and she wanted to let me know that it’s so obvious when a child is well-loved.  She also commented on how beautiful my daughter was … which made Wren beam.  Then the woman, almost instinctively, reached out with her arms to hold my daughter.

“I’m sorry. I do not know you.”

I couldn’t believe I was saying those words again.

This friendly, outgoing woman was visibly shocked at my refusal to let her hold my daughter.  But then she recovered with a smile on her face and said “I get it.”

We both smiled, exchanged a few more pleasantries, and went on our separate, merry ways.

However, this left me wondering if this was more common than I realized.  How many of you have had strangers ask to hold your baby?


3 thoughts on “It happened again.

  1. I had a few people do this with both of my girls. I don’t really get it. Unless you know someone, I just don’t understand how it is okay to ask to hold someone else’s baby.

  2. When we first started going out with our kids I was afraid this would happen. But people we don’t know usually don’t ask to hold the boys. Maybe because they are usually strapped into their stroller when we are out and about. Maybe the profuse drooling acts as a deterrent. Around people we have some acquaintance with (like people we may meet at at church) we are more than happy to hand them over. It’s nice to have our hands free for a few minutes and the boys LOVE meeting new people. I definitely understand where you are coming from. The lady from your last encounter sounded a little full of herself, this one just sounded like she was so thoroughly charmed by your daughter that she forgot herself. Maybe the common thread is that healthcare providers are used to people welcoming their interest… I don’t know, but it sounds like you are getting a lot of opportunities to be gracefully assertive.

  3. I don’t remember being worried about it when my kids were little, but after all the stories I’ve heard between then and now I have to say that you are smart not to let someone you don’t know how Wren.


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