I just wanted to let you all know a few things that happened today. We did ask that the nurse who caused us grief not care for Wren again. This seemed to be the best course of action and it brought us peace.

I returned to the hospital again today unsure of what to expect.  The first nurse who greeted me thought I was bringing Wren home today.  Another nurse who started her shift later was surprised to see us still there as well.

Wren did just as well today as yesterday, and today’s nurses’ notes reflected this. I heard from another nurse that the primary doctor was not happy (I think the actual word used was “upset”) that Wren’s recovery was stalled over the weekend.

We still do not know when she will be allowed to come home, but we have peace knowing that she had another good day. Thank you all for your prayers and support always and especially at this time.

Overall, the nursing staff has been wonderful. I have enjoyed their company and welcomed their advice. I am starting to realize that I will miss having them within earshot to help me the next time I have something new and unexpected come up!

An Update

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Pray for Wren

We got the phone call on the 14th that a birthmother had picked us. We met the birthmother on the 16th and following that awkward meeting we saw our daughter.

Her name, for purposes of this blog, is Wren. This beautiful girl was born on March 11th. We cannot imagine our lives without her already and we need your prayers.

She was born early. We are not able to discuss her condition which is keeping her in the hospital. (We knew what it was when we agreed to adopt her.) Every day since the 16th I have driven eighty miles to the hospital to hold her, sing to her, comfort her.

We have seen a remarkable improvement in her health. Strangers who see us in the hospital do not recognize she is an ill child. Nursing students included.

Tonight, we got some devastating news that will push back Wren’s release date to later this week (we had been hoping for tomorrow). The staff today did not seem confident in their assessment of her and we practically begged them to see the improvement in her. Their decision today means that she may not come home until Friday now. The baby’s social worker agreed with us which is what made this so much harder.

Please pray for the staff at the hospital to make wise decisions, for Okey and me to know they are doing what is best for our daughter and for the gaping emptiness we feel, and for Wren as it is hard for her to thrive in the hospital without dedicated caregivers.

Thanks and love to you all.

I’m still here

Well, I’ve got a few minutes to summarize my year so far, so here goes:

I’ve been soda free for over 70 days.  I haven’t found a good exercise schedule yet, but I’m still losing a little bit of weight.  I think I’ll still be able to reach my target weight by June.

We’ve ventured to West Virginia quite a bit this year, and I’m looking forward to having more people coming to visit us.  One of the bridesmaid’s in my sister’s wedding who I now call a friend, Zenny, came to visit in January.  We had exceptional weather for sightseeing around the nation’s capital.  Enna is coming up from Tennessee next week, and I’m looking forward to returning to the city now that the cherry trees are in bloom.  Oh, and my mum is coming down the following week. And my sister Marji may be flying down soon, too.  (I really hope so!)

We’ve already purchased tickets to a wine tasting in upstate New York in April, and we’re supposed to buy our plane tickets to Texas in May.  Oh, and then we need to go to Ohio to help put siding on the farmhouse.  (Although I honestly don’t know how much help we can be.)  Then there’s a high school graduation at the beach in June.  (How am I old enough to have two nieces done with high school?)

I’m bummed that I haven’t been able to meet Sarah’s beautiful twins yet.  But between their hospital stays and family visits, I’ve had to put that on hold.  I don’t know where I’ll be able to fit a trip to Raleigh, but I’m determined to make it happen.

I’ve been busy knitting nothing in particular.  I’ve been rather fond of knitting hats and perhaps at some point I’ll upload pictures of them.  I’ve certainly made a lot of hats this year.

The baby’s room is looking grand (although I still need to finish the crib skirt).  The rocking chair my father-in-law made is here.  All of the furniture we need is assembled.  The only thing left to add to this crazy concoction called our life … is a baby.

When our social worker told us to live our life as normally as we could during the wait, I wonder if she could have anticipated this… haha!

Adoption: The Profile Book

When birthparents are ready to create an adoption plan, the agency will offer them the profile of various families that match up.  So how do you capture the essence of who you are in a book containing 14-16 pages?

Okey and I were presented with this challenge early in our adoption process, and my tip to any couple going through the adoption process is to start your book as soon as you can.

Start writing your biography.  Write down everything.  Then edit it.  Keept it short!  You may each have to write a four-to-five page biography for your homestudy, so pull from that as needed.

Collect your photos that are clear and have your faces looking forward.  Include photos that show what you enjoy doing. Caption your photos!   (You know who you are, but a stranger may have difficulty recognizing you in a different hairstyle.)  Make sure to get head shots taken to include on your biography pages.  Don’t put too many photos on a page.  You can have one collage, but choose the photos wisely.
Make an outline.  Your agency should have one that you can use as a guideline.
Print out each your book in black and white.  Tape it together so that it looks like a book.  Then edit it.  Repeat.

As you near the end of the process, show your profile book to everyone.  Get their opinions and suggestions.  They might notice something you didn’t think to include.  (Example:  Our neighbor Judy noticed that we had just one photo of our dog in the profile book.  She thought that we should include a picture of our dog playing with children so that the birthparents would see that she was friendly and sociable.)

As mentioned in January, we’ve been contacted twice by our adoption agency about having our profile book shown due to special circumstances.  Our social worker informs us that our profile book has been showing well to the birthparents who match our criteria.  The only issues that she had seen expressed by the birthparents were that we did not have a straightforward “yes” to incorporating a name and to allowing a reunion visit.  We feel comfortable in our decision to consider these things after meeting the birthmother and are likely to keep things as they are.